To be honest with you, today I am having a really hard time. This summer has been a summer where my faith has been tested and deepened. I have come to a crossroads where I have to make definite plans for the future. What do you do when you're sure God has you on a path and you are convicted of it, but then you are filled with complete doubt that the plan you have put into motion is the right one. You take outside advice, you cry out to Jesus, you look to the Word, but still in your Spirit you have that nagging doubt no matter the path, that thing that won't let you go.
I often wonder what happens when we are so confused that we make wrong turns in God's will, even the big stuff? When there is no peace no matter how we consider each option?? I want nothing more that to be in His will, but if I chose the wrong path in uncertainty, will God bless my mess?
You may think that the fact that you're having doubts about a decision is reason enough, but is it really that simple? What about all the "What ifs" that plague your mind, isn't that's Satan's job to confuse?
Do I stay and dig ditches or move on to what is seemingly a much harder path? How do you have confidence in either path if there is this much doubt on one?
Let's remember what we know:
We have a God that loves us unconditionally, so much so that He will correct our paths with great mercy and grace.
There is power in surrender.
I also know this, that if I am struggling, God is working and if God is working this out in me, He is most assuredly working this out for someone else. Praying for those who are struggling with me today that you step boldly into this next step.
Friday, July 19, 2013
Saturday, July 13, 2013
Power of the Word
" Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Do not cast me from your presence or take your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of your salvation. and grant me a willing spirit to sustain me."- Psalm 51:10-12
Do you ever feel like you just don't get it? Like you'll never get it. By 'it', I mean the absolute deep understanding and passion for and of Christ. The task and great burden I often feel (or sometimes don't feel) to share the Gospel is sometimes so enormous, I get discouraged that I am the Christian that I should be or more importantly, my relationship with Christ is not what is should be. That's when I become either one of two things- overwhelmed and compartmentalize God or overzealous and burn myself out with so much time in the Word that I don't have time to live it out.
God revealed two big things in the midst of transition and a spiritual battle that continues to rock my core. One- the thoughts are placed in my head are just words, words have no power like Jesus does. The lies that Satan places in my heart and head are not who I am-they are who Satan wants me to be.
Two- in the midst of any spiritual battle, my focus in prayer becomes solely about His deliverance from the problem and therefore my thoughts focus on the problem and not the Healer and the Solution.
I always have a problem with discipline in spending time in the Word, but days outside of it are tortuous. The one thing that has held true throughout this whole battle, two weeks and counting, His Words are the life that is breathing into me. I am breaking a barrier from head knowledge to heart knowledge. I can see the fruit of being in the Word like never before.
It is my prayer that my heart revealed today is a heart that is routed in You, Jesus. That others maybe encouraged through my journey and that your glory would be revealed.
Do you ever feel like you just don't get it? Like you'll never get it. By 'it', I mean the absolute deep understanding and passion for and of Christ. The task and great burden I often feel (or sometimes don't feel) to share the Gospel is sometimes so enormous, I get discouraged that I am the Christian that I should be or more importantly, my relationship with Christ is not what is should be. That's when I become either one of two things- overwhelmed and compartmentalize God or overzealous and burn myself out with so much time in the Word that I don't have time to live it out.
God revealed two big things in the midst of transition and a spiritual battle that continues to rock my core. One- the thoughts are placed in my head are just words, words have no power like Jesus does. The lies that Satan places in my heart and head are not who I am-they are who Satan wants me to be.
Two- in the midst of any spiritual battle, my focus in prayer becomes solely about His deliverance from the problem and therefore my thoughts focus on the problem and not the Healer and the Solution.
I always have a problem with discipline in spending time in the Word, but days outside of it are tortuous. The one thing that has held true throughout this whole battle, two weeks and counting, His Words are the life that is breathing into me. I am breaking a barrier from head knowledge to heart knowledge. I can see the fruit of being in the Word like never before.
It is my prayer that my heart revealed today is a heart that is routed in You, Jesus. That others maybe encouraged through my journey and that your glory would be revealed.
Thursday, July 11, 2013
All Things Work Together for Our Good
In the midst of any trial in life, it's hard to imagine how it could possibly work out for our good. How could these set of circumstances have anything good come out of it, let alone teach me or prepare me for something greater? Satan is filling your head with lies, condemnation, shame, blame, shots at your self worth, and questions your salvation. It's a constant battle to keep your head a float, especially if you are a thinker like me. My mom would call me an over-thinker, which has it's advantages, but also it's disadvantages. Over-thinkers have a great need to understand why something is happening and to plan out what to do to fix it. Unfortunately, Satan knows some of our idiosyncrasies: I know he does mine. He eventually gets me to over-think so much- that he tries to convince me that I should give up or give in to whatever thoughts are coming into my head about a situation.
Understanding is at the core of every human's belief system. We need to understand why we are here, what our purpose is, why things happen in a certain way, and what is the most reasonable way to gain this understanding. Believing in Jesus is not about understanding on our terms, it's on His terms. Our stories are all unique and evolving in belief and faith. Our journey starts with a decision, but it doesn't mean we understand it all immediately. It sometimes takes years for us to truly understand our life's calling for Jesus and I definitely fall into that category.
I was a "church kid" from birth. My parents were God-fearing people who knew the importance of setting me on a path to knowing Him. I was christened as an infant by Uncle in the Methodist Church. We were at church all during the week, plus on the weekend. To say we were involved, well, that was an understatement. In sixth grade, I went through a confirmation class to learn more about Jesus and the Methodist Church. At the end of my sixth grade year, the obvious choice was to join the church and confirm my original baptism. I didn't really understand what it all meant, just that I wanted to be a part of the tradition and legacy of my family in Christ. I knew it was the right choice. I spent my teenage years in youth group, on mission trips, retreats, and in Bible Study. I grew up believing in Him, but never really knowing how to have a relationship with Him. I always had a desire to know Him and understand Him more on a deeper level but never really knowing how. Now, there are very few times in my life that I haven't been in church, but it wasn't until I was an adult that I realized the absolute need I have for Him. Now, I chose to be baptized by immersion as an adult almost five years ago, but always in my heart I felt that one was for the wrong reasons, that my heart truly wasn't set on Him. Then a little over three years ago, I decided through my new members class at a church, I was ready to recommit for the right reasons. The expectations of baptism, recommitting to what I already knew, for me wasn't about me having a divine revelation in that moment, but making a commitment to a deeper relationship with Him. My story is convoluted, imperfect, and Satan wants me to believe that I have to have some life-altering story to be a true Christ follower like I was once a drug-dealer and a near-death experience brought me to Jesus. From a young age, I believed in Jesus and what He did on that Cross. I didn't grasp the depth of knowing that God on such personal level to much later, I'm still grappling with it. There's no way to understand what He did, it just is. The truth is it is my story, God knew it and I don't need to understand it, just know that He knows me. He knows that I am slow to warm and it took me a little longer than most to get what He has planned for me. And guess what-I'm still a work in progress.
Those lies based in the need for earthly understanding will tear you away from the obvious hand God has in your life, whether you are a believer or not. Think on all the illnesses you have overcome, the places He has taken you, the joys and pains of this life. My story is far from perfect- yours doesn't have to be either because there is a Perfect God who doesn't care so much about the details, but about YOU.
"He has made EVERYTHING BEAUTIFUL in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet, no one can fathom what God has done from the beginning to end." -Ecc 3:11
Understanding is at the core of every human's belief system. We need to understand why we are here, what our purpose is, why things happen in a certain way, and what is the most reasonable way to gain this understanding. Believing in Jesus is not about understanding on our terms, it's on His terms. Our stories are all unique and evolving in belief and faith. Our journey starts with a decision, but it doesn't mean we understand it all immediately. It sometimes takes years for us to truly understand our life's calling for Jesus and I definitely fall into that category.
I was a "church kid" from birth. My parents were God-fearing people who knew the importance of setting me on a path to knowing Him. I was christened as an infant by Uncle in the Methodist Church. We were at church all during the week, plus on the weekend. To say we were involved, well, that was an understatement. In sixth grade, I went through a confirmation class to learn more about Jesus and the Methodist Church. At the end of my sixth grade year, the obvious choice was to join the church and confirm my original baptism. I didn't really understand what it all meant, just that I wanted to be a part of the tradition and legacy of my family in Christ. I knew it was the right choice. I spent my teenage years in youth group, on mission trips, retreats, and in Bible Study. I grew up believing in Him, but never really knowing how to have a relationship with Him. I always had a desire to know Him and understand Him more on a deeper level but never really knowing how. Now, there are very few times in my life that I haven't been in church, but it wasn't until I was an adult that I realized the absolute need I have for Him. Now, I chose to be baptized by immersion as an adult almost five years ago, but always in my heart I felt that one was for the wrong reasons, that my heart truly wasn't set on Him. Then a little over three years ago, I decided through my new members class at a church, I was ready to recommit for the right reasons. The expectations of baptism, recommitting to what I already knew, for me wasn't about me having a divine revelation in that moment, but making a commitment to a deeper relationship with Him. My story is convoluted, imperfect, and Satan wants me to believe that I have to have some life-altering story to be a true Christ follower like I was once a drug-dealer and a near-death experience brought me to Jesus. From a young age, I believed in Jesus and what He did on that Cross. I didn't grasp the depth of knowing that God on such personal level to much later, I'm still grappling with it. There's no way to understand what He did, it just is. The truth is it is my story, God knew it and I don't need to understand it, just know that He knows me. He knows that I am slow to warm and it took me a little longer than most to get what He has planned for me. And guess what-I'm still a work in progress.
Those lies based in the need for earthly understanding will tear you away from the obvious hand God has in your life, whether you are a believer or not. Think on all the illnesses you have overcome, the places He has taken you, the joys and pains of this life. My story is far from perfect- yours doesn't have to be either because there is a Perfect God who doesn't care so much about the details, but about YOU.
"He has made EVERYTHING BEAUTIFUL in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet, no one can fathom what God has done from the beginning to end." -Ecc 3:11
Wednesday, July 10, 2013
What is restoration? Restoration is the act of returning something to it's former, unimpaired position. It means renewal and revival. If we are being honest with ourselves, there are things in our lives that have impaired our vision spiritually. We have been hurt in a way that we have trouble feeling or experiencing something the same way. Satan uses these experiences to attempt to tear us away from God, from be restored to the promises He has for us.
In the midst of these battles, I find the most obvious ways Satan tries to work is to confuse us in ways that completely alter our sense of self. That try to turn us away from God. He condemns us and makes us feel guilty by the way we look at our behavior.
Honestly, my most recent spiritual battle has been a fleshly one, one that I have battled before in a much different form. It has shaken my core and has caused me great heartache. It has caused me to look at certain people and things in a new and unsavory light that I do not like. Yet, my pursuit of God in it has been the strongest ever. I have delved so much into the word, been bold in the asking of prayer, and in my prayers there has been constant stream of God's faithfulness. Through it all, the one word that keeps coming to my mind and being said in my prayers is RESTORE.
It's easy to give up, it's easy to take your eyes of the prize, but at the beginning of this journey, God placed a Word so Deep in my Heart- that it has been the truth that I have held onto throughout it is: "He won't win"...
Now, perhaps you are struggling with something- a spiritual battle so intense that you just want to run. I want to encourage you to stay the course- delve deep into the Word. Know what Christ says about you: that anyone in Christ is a New Creation, that you are wholly and dearly loved, He knows our inmost parts and created them specifically for us, He knows the hairs on our heads, and the truth that You are His Beloved- He died so that He could take on all of this. Lay it on Him. If your struggles are earthly, fleshly- I pray that your heart be renewed to know that He is your Prince of Peace, be bold in sharing with others, and rest in the knowledge that Satan won't win. He is restoring you to himself- the ultimate reward.
"Restore us, God Almighty: make your face shine on us, that we may be saved"- Psalm 80:7
"Restore to me the joy of your Salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me. " Psalm 51:12
Praying for all who read and share this with someone who might need it. "Rejoice in the Lord, for He is good- His Love Endures Forever!"
In the midst of these battles, I find the most obvious ways Satan tries to work is to confuse us in ways that completely alter our sense of self. That try to turn us away from God. He condemns us and makes us feel guilty by the way we look at our behavior.
Honestly, my most recent spiritual battle has been a fleshly one, one that I have battled before in a much different form. It has shaken my core and has caused me great heartache. It has caused me to look at certain people and things in a new and unsavory light that I do not like. Yet, my pursuit of God in it has been the strongest ever. I have delved so much into the word, been bold in the asking of prayer, and in my prayers there has been constant stream of God's faithfulness. Through it all, the one word that keeps coming to my mind and being said in my prayers is RESTORE.
It's easy to give up, it's easy to take your eyes of the prize, but at the beginning of this journey, God placed a Word so Deep in my Heart- that it has been the truth that I have held onto throughout it is: "He won't win"...
Now, perhaps you are struggling with something- a spiritual battle so intense that you just want to run. I want to encourage you to stay the course- delve deep into the Word. Know what Christ says about you: that anyone in Christ is a New Creation, that you are wholly and dearly loved, He knows our inmost parts and created them specifically for us, He knows the hairs on our heads, and the truth that You are His Beloved- He died so that He could take on all of this. Lay it on Him. If your struggles are earthly, fleshly- I pray that your heart be renewed to know that He is your Prince of Peace, be bold in sharing with others, and rest in the knowledge that Satan won't win. He is restoring you to himself- the ultimate reward.
"Restore us, God Almighty: make your face shine on us, that we may be saved"- Psalm 80:7
"Restore to me the joy of your Salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me. " Psalm 51:12
Praying for all who read and share this with someone who might need it. "Rejoice in the Lord, for He is good- His Love Endures Forever!"
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